When complaints become a way of life

Assalaamu’alaykum, 

During a group coaching session yesterday, we were discussing how easily our thoughts can spiral into complaints without us noticing.

One small complaint turns into a constant murmur in the background… and slowly, that inner noise becomes our way of seeing the world.

It’s subtle. We start seeing things and people as a burden.

The gym. A walk. An interaction. Cooking. Cleaning. Hosting.

Anything that feels like work becomes something we have to suffer through.

But is it really suffering… or is it just our interpretation?

If we keep repeating the same negative thoughts, they carve out mental pathways.

Over time, that mindset settles in. We don’t just think negatively, we start living that way.

We speak in complaint.

We carry frustration in our bodies.

We become difficult to live with, even for ourselves.

Without saying the words, we can easily see ourselves as victims.

Victims of our life, circumstances and others.

But change is very much within our reach.

A conscious shift in language can change your entire experience… sometimes in an instant!

“I have to go for a walk” becomes:

“I get to move. I have a body that works.”

“This house is a mess” becomes:

“I’m grateful I have a home to care for.”

“They never care for me” becomes:

“I’m learning to communicate my needs and value my own care.”

Small reframes, but they lift the heaviness off. They return you to presence.

Because the moment we stop viewing everything through a negative filter, we open the door to gratitude and barakah.

This week, I invite you to try this:

• Notice when a complaint creeps in. Don’t judge it, just observe.
• Try reframing it in a way that honours the blessing underneath.
• Speak the new thought out loud. Let your body hear it.

There’s light and liberation in what can seem hard and difficult, sometimes it’s just hidden in the way we speak.

P.S. Here's a few ways we can work together...

1. Join Breaking Barriers Coaching Group. Together, we’ll deepen our trust in Allah, take inspired actions and witness with gratitude how incredible outcomes unfold. This a space for spiritual and personal growth, practical tools, meaningful suhba (companionship) and life transforming reminders (Available to sisters only).

2. If you're ready to shift your perspectives, discover your true self and align your efforts with your highest worldly and spiritual aspirations, click HERE to schedule a 1:1 discovery call with me. (Available to sisters only).

3. Join The Travellers Programme HERE. (Available to both brothers and sisters).

4. Join Sail Forward, a budget-friendly group coaching circle where you’ll receive personalised laser coaching in a supportive, faith-rooted space. It’s designed to help you reflect, realign and rise with practical tools and spiritual grounding. Small groups, big impact. You can learn more or sign up HERE. (Available to both brothers and sisters).

5. Join the Telegram community for short, inspiring messages that uplift you throughout the week and help you stay aligned and comforted by a faith-centered perspective. Join HERE. (Open to all). 

Reflection of the Week

What’s one area of your life that you’ve been viewing as a burden lately?

Take a moment to pause, reframe it and ask: What’s the hidden blessing here?

Dua of the Week

أَنِّي مَسَّنِيَ الضُّرُّ وَأَنتَ أَرْحَمُ الرَّاحِمِينَ 

Dua of Prophet Ayub (A.S.):
‘Indeed, distress has befallen me, and You are the Most Merciful of the merciful.’
(Al Anbiya, 83)