Why hardship and gratitude go hand in hand

Assalaamu’alaykum, 

This week inside Breaking Barriers, we had a very powerful session during our monthly Shukr Circle.

The theme was hardships.

Now, gratitude isn’t something we naturally associate with difficulty. But the reflections that emerged were deeply moving and I wanted to share a few with you because they apply to all of us.

We spoke about the nature of hardship, how it comes in different shapes, sizes and intensities. How it’s subjective. What feels overwhelming for one person might feel manageable for another and none of it is for us to judge.

We also reflected on the concept of kabad (something I recently wrote about), that Allah created us to live with toil and struggle as part of being human and as part of being tested in this brief stage of our soul's journey.

And that we don’t choose our tests. Allah does. Because He knows our capacity better than we know ourselves.

One of the most grounding reminders was this: hardships come in waves.

When you’re inside a difficulty, the stuckness can feel suffocating, like there’s no way out. But if you look back honestly, you’ll find situations that once felt unbearable, yet they passed. You’re no longer there.

The tests come in waves and with them come waves of ease.

Not just one, but many.

And something I shared from my own reflections is this: ease is comfortable, yes. But ease after hardship carries a sweetness that can’t be tasted any other way.

We also spoke about how turning to Allah during hardship is itself a sign of His love. Even if someone feels their difficulty is a form of punishment, there is still mercy in it.
Because Allah could take the soul at any moment. Instead, He gives time. Chances. Opportunities to return. Again and again. That, in itself, is love!

At the heart of every hardship is pure gold.

If we unwrap it with awareness, taqwa and sabr, we will find it.

Some of the sisters shared incredibly profound reflections, including:

• Hardships can break unhealthy attachments that unknowingly hold the heart hostage.

• In any difficulty, our first point of help must always be Allah, before any means. If we turn to the means before Allah, our efforts may be futile. 

• Instead of fixating on the solution, we should look for the eases Allah has already placed around us, often they are many, even when the solution feels delayed.

These perspective shifts don’t necessarily remove the hardship but they help us rise above the feeling of being trapped inside it. They give life to the spiritual heart, steady the mind and allow us to keep moving forward with trust rather than despair.

I’m sharing this because Breaking Barriers (sisters coaching group) was created for exactly these kinds of conversations. A non-judgmental space for sisters to reflect, process and grow together.
A space where you’re seen, heard and supported.

It’s £25 a month, cancel any time.

Click here to find out more: Yes I'm Interested

You’re welcome to come in, try it for a month and simply experience the space. You can engage as much or as little as you feel comfortable. There’s no pressure. Even being present has made a real difference in sisters lives. Alhamdulilah.

Beyond the live sessions, there's so much depth within the space. From supportive accountability groups, to a rich resource centre built over six plus years, filled with reflections, practical tools, insights and lived wisdom shared by experts from all over the world. Being immersed in an environment like this has a way of realigning the heart and re-centring the soul, especially when life feels heavy or distracting.

We’re also now gearing up for a light Ramadan programme within Breaking Barriers, designed to help us stay mindful, anchored, and intentional, so we can maximise the blessings of Ramadan without feeling overwhelmed. Join Here

If your heart is craving meaningful suhba (sisterhood), reflection and spiritually grounding reminders, we'd love to welcome you in. 

Reflection of the Week

Think of a hardship you’re currently facing.

Where are you searching for the solution…

and where might Allah already be offering ease?

Dua of the Week

اللَّهُمَّ لَا سَهْلَ إِلَّا مَا جَعَلْتَهُ سَهْلًا، وَأَنْتَ تَجْعَلُ الْحَزْنَ إِذَا شِئْتَ سَهْلًا

Allahumma la sahla illa ma ja‘altahu sahla, wa anta taj‘alul-hazna idha shi’ta sahla

O Allah, there is no ease except what You make easy, and You make hardship easy if You will.

Allah's name of the Week

Al-Lateef (The Most Subtle, The Gentle)

Ya Al-Lateef, You work with a gentleness we often don’t recognise until later. Help us notice the quiet eases You place within our hardships, and soften our hearts to trust Your wisdom even when answers feel delayed.